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Both types of narcissists will shamelessly manipulate others to have their way. They will wear down their sources of supply with their constant demands and mind games. They are high-maintenance “drama queens.” They seem to have no self esteem. Vulnerable narcissists are the emotional and financial vampires who will suck your funds dry and constantly demand attention and comfort for their many problems. In fact, they may seem to take a kind of perverse pride in their failures and hard luck. They are less likely to be materially successful, and may be dependent on others for their survival. Vulnerable narcissists, rather than brag about their achievements and never showing their feelings, are given to bouts of self pity, and use emotions (like crying, whining, demanding, or sulking) to manipulate others into giving them what they want. Grandiose narcissists don’t care what others think of them. Our current society glorifies the traits of the grandiose narcissist and doesn’t seem to bemoan what they don’t have: the ability to show emotion and feel love or empathy. Those who haven’t achieved success will stop at nothing to rise to the top, even if it means destroying their competition in the process. Grandiose narcissists are the CEOs, politicians, narcissistic celebrities and others who have achieved a high level of success. And like all narcissists, they are incapable of love but may be able to put on a show of “falling in love” to obtain a new source of narcissistic supply. Like all narcissists, they are never happy,but they can “act” happy if they need to. You won’t see them show emotions other than rage or pride, and if they are ever sad or fearful, you will never see that side of them. On the surface they seem strong and tough. They can be very quick to judge others though. Grandiose narcissists can seem emotionally cold, convinced of their achievements or success, and rarely if ever talk about their fears or their problems. The two kinds of narcissists can seem very different on the surface: Either can be somatic or cerebral, and either can also be malignant or non-malignant. Both the beggar and the king could be narcissists with a different M.O.Īn interesting article in Psychology Today explains the difference between grandiose (invulnerable) narcissists, and “vulnerable” narcissists.